"Want to know my concept of old age?"
(inside)
You!!
Happy Birthday

Birthdays are hard.. but nothing in life comes easy.. it's one long struggle filled with disappointments and failed expectations one after another until one day.. maybe.. just maybe your goals are within reach...
(inside)
...and then you die.
Happy Birthday

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Number one... Number one... Number one... Number one... Number one... Number one...
(inside)
You're #1!
Happy Birthday!

For your birthday, here is a gift certificate for one pair of Space Panties!
(inside)
From the person that thinks your ass is out of this world!
Happy Birthday!

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I was making obscene balloon animals.
(inside)
It's your birthday...
celebrate appropriately.

How Men and Women get Crows Feet...
(inside)
Happy Birthday to someone who's earned every one!

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Oh Barbara. Oh Yes. This is it. Oh you've REALLY done it this time.
(inside)
It's your birthday. Treat yourself to excess.

On your birthday a slice of cake will make you feel better...
(inside)
A shot of tequilla couldn't hurt!

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